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Should men be praised for what women do all the time?

April 24th 2008 04:42
Why do men get so much praise when they do things that were once considered the women’s role?
When we were sitting at the airport several weeks ago, waiting to board our flight Samantha had a wee smelly accident, as babies do. My husband gets up and takes her to the parent’s room to be changed. The woman in the seat next to me said, “Oh you are so lucky what a great husband you have does he help out all the time?”
Similarly, when we went shopping and I needed to go to the toilet he held Samantha and they waited outside for me. When I come out he there is a woman standing there telling him how great he is and then turns to me and says, “You are so lucky, he obviously loves her’, no kidding of course he does he is her father!
When I am out and I have changed Samantha’s nappy nobody tells me how great I am, and nobody comes up and tells me it is obvious I love my baby.
An accountant friend of mine works fulltime and is the family’s main breadwinner while her husband stays at home and brings up both their children. Everyone thinks he is fantastic, for being a stay at home dad, and don’t get me wrong, he is. I also think my friend is fantastic for becoming so accomplished in what traditionally is a males role, but I don’t think she gets constant praise every day.
Women are expected to be part of the workforce nowadays as well as being a carer, but men it seems are still not expected to be a carer as well as holding down a job, seems to me a bit unfair, what do you think?

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6 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Louie

April 24th 2008 05:49
I hear you....its crazy, but it is hard to see it changing.


Comment by Sara Dobson

April 24th 2008 23:31
I agree probably won't change in our lifetime

Comment by Mrs M

April 28th 2008 06:52
Hi Sara,

I agree with Louie it is crazy.

I usually say something like "well yes, he does take an interest in his child"

Probably a bit passive aggressive I know but what can you do when confronted with a stupid comment.

Love & stuff
Mrs M

Comment by AmyHuang

April 30th 2008 23:47
I think it's more of a jealousy thing rather than praise Sara My mum is always telling me she loves my fiance because he is more domestic around the house than I am (yes, I am a terrible mess) - he is the complete opposite to who my Dad is! However, I think men are like children - you give them a little bit of praise and they'll continue doing things to get that praise. Think of it as training the opposite sex

Comment by Glenn Murray

May 23rd 2008 01:11
Hi Sara. I'm one of those dad's who gets praised. I agree that it's ridiculous; my wife works much harder than I do (I just work in an office), and when it comes to the kids, she's much better at virtually everything than me. So it seems crazy that I get such nice comments from mums & grand-mums when I'm out walking or running with the kids. Having said that, it still feels very nice. If it does no more than reinforce my behaviour, that's gotta be a good thing. Especially when you consider that many men would probably be critical of the very same behaviour (if only because it makes them look bad!).

Comment by Sara Dobson

May 23rd 2008 04:39
Hi Glen

Thanks for your comments. It is nice to get compliments and I suppose if having lots of women tell my husband he's great encourages him to do even more with Samantha thats got to be a good thing.


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