Prue DeAraugo
RyanaProtector of the next generation
May 11th 2008 10:21
I have wanted to be a mother for a while now and I am definitely not a young mother so why is going from a career (that frankly I was not that interested in anyway) to being a stay at home mum so hard to reconcile. Why is it that I am suddenly thinking that I should have just written that novel that has been going around in my head for years or done that African Safari I always dreamed of before I had a baby?
Suddenly I feel self-conscious when filling out that departure card at the airport. A question there asks occupation. I hate writing homemaker. In my mid 30s I should be over caring what other people think I should be more secure about my place in society, but I hate it when I meet a professional person and they say ask “What do you do?” and I reply I am a mum. “Oh ok” they reply with a glazed look in their eye, “Oh but I used to be an Account Director, I am just on maternity leave at the moment”, I quickly pipe up even though I have no intention of going back to that job ever again. Truth is I love what I am doing and I do not want to go back to 12-hour days.
One of the hardest things to reconcile as a stay at home mum was the sudden lack of income. Not that my income was that BIG before was that big but it kept me in new shoes. What’s more, I could just happily buy those gorgeous shoes and caramel macchiato without any guilt. I am not bothered about the shoes now as any mother will tell you chasing after a baby in high heels is a recipe for disaster. However, as I sit here sipping on my caramel macchiato it dawns on me that money I am spending was not actually earned by me. I know it’s supposed to be our money not his, and my job is equally as important as my husband’s. Right?
I am happy with where I am at in my life now, but I still cannot help but wonder if I am ever going to be a world famous writer or whether I will ever get round to that African Safari.
Suddenly I feel self-conscious when filling out that departure card at the airport. A question there asks occupation. I hate writing homemaker. In my mid 30s I should be over caring what other people think I should be more secure about my place in society, but I hate it when I meet a professional person and they say ask “What do you do?” and I reply I am a mum. “Oh ok” they reply with a glazed look in their eye, “Oh but I used to be an Account Director, I am just on maternity leave at the moment”, I quickly pipe up even though I have no intention of going back to that job ever again. Truth is I love what I am doing and I do not want to go back to 12-hour days.
One of the hardest things to reconcile as a stay at home mum was the sudden lack of income. Not that my income was that BIG before was that big but it kept me in new shoes. What’s more, I could just happily buy those gorgeous shoes and caramel macchiato without any guilt. I am not bothered about the shoes now as any mother will tell you chasing after a baby in high heels is a recipe for disaster. However, as I sit here sipping on my caramel macchiato it dawns on me that money I am spending was not actually earned by me. I know it’s supposed to be our money not his, and my job is equally as important as my husband’s. Right?
I am happy with where I am at in my life now, but I still cannot help but wonder if I am ever going to be a world famous writer or whether I will ever get round to that African Safari.
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Comment by Mrs M
Mum's Word
I became a mum 7 years ago and had the same thoughts as you. I was a National Marketing Executive in my previous life.
I've been doing freelance writing ever since my first was born but late last year I took on a contract assignment to assist in organising a conference. My first office job since becoming a mum and I have to say that I realise that I can never go back to an office job.
All the rubbish politics and squabbles, who needs it. I realise that some of the biggest children I know are in fact adults and quite frankly it puts everything into perspective.
All of a sudden it seemed like that office job had no real meaning anymore.
Don't feel bad Sara. As my mother would say "this too shall pass".
Love & stuff
Mrs M
Comment by Sara Dobson
My Turn
I used to see so many mums stressed because they couldn't get away from the office to pick up their kids from child care. And the childcare facility charging them something like $5 per min every minute they are late.
I can't go back!